Sunday, March 27, 2005

EASTER All You Can Take

My show is on for tonight, Easter Sunday, March 27, 2005. We will be having Easter Dinner Chinese style from the Chinese place on the corner of B and 3rd. It's good and cheap. The show starts at 7 pm and I'll be taking orders at 7:15. It shouldn't cost you more than $5. There are cheap beers and wine at the show, too.

Apocalypse Lounge
E 3rd between A and B aves
7 pm - 9 pm
sign up at 6:50 pm. Show starts at 7.

I encourage odd acts to show up, but any acts are welcome, especially acts delivered by intellectuals. I love smart dudes.

Also, I'll be performing at the KNITTING FACTORY on Friday, April 1st - 74 Leonard St. Tickets are $6 each and you can buy them here online or at

Show details here.

It's a night of comedy music, featuring ME on first at 8 pm, Sharon Mama Spell, Stuckey & Murray and Tickle Dracula, who I like very much.

Hope you can make it...

Finally, I'd like to say this.

I got an email a few weeks ago from Celia Bressack promoting the show "Mariajuanalogues". It said if we went to the box office and said we had tickets for "Marty Wanna" we could get in for free. My bf and I rode over there today on our bikes a half hour before show time, and tried to get our free tickets. The guy at the box office, who said his name was Sam, was so rude. He cut me off, yelling, "The promotions over! Go away! Get out of here!" I said, "I have an e-mail here which says it's good until today's date." I took it out to try to show it to him, and he just started repeating rapid fire, "The promotion is over. If you want to buy a ticket, they're $35" which alternated with "Get out of here if you don't want a ticket." He said that about ten times while I stood there looking like an asshole in front of ten or so people who were also waiting for tickets.

I was very embarrassed and pretty irritated at this dick for being so rude on top of having a FLAMING gay accent which definitely didn't make him seem any less like an overly melodramatic f-ing a-hole.

I went and got on my bike, defeated, and rode away.

IT'S FUCKING EASTER! Jesus wouldn't have wanted that.

Remember, friends - Easter or not, it's never a good idea to scream at strangers. They could be crazier than you.

As I peddled away on my bike, I thought of ways to get even. I could get a bucket of water, I thought, and splash it into the box office hole all over the guy. I could throw a rock through the box office window tonight after the place is all closed down. I could wait for Sam at the end of the day and spit on him. Finally, I decided to eat a piece of pizza and get over it.

Though not as fulfilling as spitting on him or dumping water on him might have been, at least now I understand why they call the West Village gay. Because whether or not it's gay in a homosexual way, it's definitely fucking gay. I can't wait to move to Chinatown, where gayness doesn't exist - but there's a plethora of cheap food and rent, which is decidedly UN gay, if you ask me.

No comments: